Last night as I fell asleep with Emily in my arms, I began to dream. I had a dream that seems to have sent me a very clear message but for the sake of remembrance, I must record it to the best of my ability. I will begin by introducing a new character: Carly. Carly and I met towards the end of last year. She has always been considered off limits to be because she has a very serious boyfriend of about 4 years and I’m no home wrecker. I have, however, always been particularly attracted to Carly though. She is average height, slender, beautiful, and covered in adorable freckles. She has a great sense of humor and we always find things to talk about. So far, she has been a really good friend to me as well. She listens to my problems with Emily, she helps me sort them out, and she seems to enjoy hanging out with me as well. I will not risk this friendship for anything though. Especially since she has a boyfriend. Anyways.
The opening of my dream was a blur, but I remember that I was somewhere familiar in the dream, but not familiar to my waking life. I was with Emily for a little bit before she had to leave. After being alone for a while, I remember being in my old house with Carly. I know that we were doing something and hanging out before that, but I don’t know what it was. I vaguely remember telling Carly that I appreciated everything that she’s done for me and I had been waiting to do something for a long time. Right before gently kissing her. She was surprised and protested while I tried to explain that I was attracted to her and I wanted to know what it was like. We walked back to my house and went in and went to sit on my old couch. Before we sat down though, Carly stopped, turned to me and looked me in the eyes. She was slightly shorter than me, so she had to look up a little bit.
“What’s wrong?” I remember saying.
“I may regret this, but do that again.” She replied with a schemish look in her eyes.
“Do what?” I asked innocently.
“This.” She grabbed my hand and gently pulled me towards her to kiss her. We made out standing up for a bit before I sat down on the couch and pulled her down to sit on my lap.
“I have really liked you for a long time.” I said after we stopped kissing.
“I know” Carly said, with her addictive little grin.
“But I’m also with Emily and I don’t know what to do.”
“I think you know what to do and you’re just kidding yourself. You don’t want to be with her anymore. So don’t.” Carly said before kissing me again. “You know you love me.”
The rest is a blur. Many different things happened, many places were visited, but I remember one constant: Carly. She was there through all of it but the difference between the dream Carly and the real Carly was that she was there the whole time, holding my hand and kissing me. One scene saw my family sitting around a table eating dinner and Carly came in as though she had been there the whole time with a beaming smile on her face and love in her eyes. My family greeted her warmly and she returned the greeting before pulling up a chair to sit next to me and kiss me on the cheek. The entire family had conversations and Carly was a part of each one. There were scenes that seemed to be straight out of a B rated Horror flick that showed me protecting Carly against some low budget monster or a balloon that we believed to be a monster. I remember kids running around while I tried to avoid the toys they left on the floor. I remember hardwood floors. I remembered midnight drives to a fast food restaurant. I remember falling asleep next to Carly.
I awoke to feel the hand on my stomach move ever so slightly. As I blinked the weariness out of my eyes, I was slightly shocked to find Emily there as opposed to Carly. She was still asleep, luckily, as my waking memories began to filter through my subconscious memories. I fought tirelessly to remember the events of this dream as I knew that there was most likely some significance but I couldn’t well write about it while Emily was here, and I couldn’t talk to anyone about it while Emily was around. Now is my first real chance to talk about what I had dreamed about last night and try to figure out if I should really leave Emily in quest of a better life with someone like Carly or if this is really a bullshit dream to ignore. I am eager to return to sleep in hopes of having the same dream again, but something tells me that I shouldn’t expect an encore performance…
helplessromanticist 
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